Ganymeder

Ramblings and Musings and Nanowrimo 2010 Prep

Yesterday on Twitter, some fellow writers and I discussed (read: PANICKED) how Nanowrimo was only (just over) two months away, how excited we were, and what prep work (if any) we planned to do. This naturally got me musing about all I’ve gleaned from my three previous years and possibly sharing some of this experience to help other Nanowrimos (or is it just Wrimos? I can never figure that one out).

It’s true that I’m no Shakespeare, though I do happen to think that I’m not bad. If you want to see bad, just read my very first Nanowrimo! It’s okay, since everyone’s first attempt sucks. That’s the beauty of November. You give yourself permission to write utter crap. And something beautiful is born from it like a Phoenix from the ashes – even if it’s only a deeper appreciation of books and the fact that they’re a hell of a lot of work! Fun and rewarding work maybe, but still work.

So I’m going to share some techniques I’ve used in the past. They might not work for you, after all everyone’s different, but I’m putting it out there in case it helps. I’m also thinking of blogging about Nanowrimo, both before and after, on Audioboo. It seems like a simpler way to get the point across without so much typing! I can just post the highlights of the Boo on my blog with the audio embedded on the page.

I have all sorts of lovely strategies to get myself to meet my daily word goals, but before the actual month begins I have a short to-do list too. Number one might not seem to tie in, but in my mind it does. I give myself a deadline to finish any other writing projects that I’ve stalled on over the course of the year. Right now I have a couple short stories that I haven’t finished, some flash to edit, and I want to write at least eight extra flash (4 #Fridayflash, 4 52/250 stories) so I can keep posting for those commitments during November. Last year I took the month off from flash which I really regretted. If I have the stories prewritten, I don’t need to break my stride by switching from one story to another.

There’s also some books I’d like to read first. They’re by no means a requirement, but at least I’d like to finish the books I’m already on. I know it’s months ahead, but as November approaches I switch to reading books I’ve already read many times so I can stop without feeling bad about it. Miscellaneous things come up too, so I keep a notebook handy to remind myself to include them.

Right now though, for anyone who wants to do some easy preparation for National Novel Writing Month, I suggest you listen to some podcasts in your car or while doing something else. I found some from last year on Audioboo that I downloaded. I’m already getting excited!

For anyone who is interested, I can be found at both the Nanowrimo site and Audioboo as ganymeder.

Have a great day!

http://www.planetclaire.org/doctorwho/ninth_doctor.php

Dr. Who -BOOM TOWN (season 1)

Margaret: I spared her life.
The Doctor: You let one of them go but that’s nothing new. Every now and then a little victim’s spared because she smiled, ’cause he’s got freckles. ‘Cause they begged. And that’s how you live with yourself. That’s how you slaughter millions. Because once in awhile—on a whim, if the wind’s in the right direction—you happen to be kind.
Margaret: Only a killer would know that.

It’s amazing the way your mind wanders, how little things…quotes from t.v. shows and bits of blogs, make you think of the strangest things.

I’ve been studying Esperanto lately with my little boy, and we’ve been having a lot of fun.  And it didn’t occur to me until after we’d begun studying that the first time we’d heard of it was actually years before through Scifi. Red Dwarf features it as a second language throughout the show and Harry Harrison talks about it as the Galactic secondary language in his Stainless Steel Rat book series.  After we’d begun studying the language, I began to understand why.

Esperanto was created as a supplementary language to facilitate peaceful relations between people of different language backgrounds and cultures.  It’s not meant to replace anyone’s native language, but rather to ease communication while preserving the linguistic and cultural identity of its speakers.  In fact, Esperanto has a culture of it’s own.

Because of it’s original peaceful intent, its sometimes referred to as a Peace Movement itself.  Because it doesn’t belong to any one country, nor is it a requirement, the people who study it tend to be self motivated activists and idealists.  There are a lot of vegetarians and vegans in the Esperanto movement.

Which led me to thinking of the similarities between Esperanto and veg*nism. Both movements are considered somewhat on the fringe.  Both are taken up by a small fraction of the overall population of the Earth.  Both are considered by many as a good idea though unattainable “in real life.” Both have lofty, noble, peaceful goals.

Which led me to remember the Doctor Who quote above.  You may wonder why I’ve cited it in a post about Esperanto and Veganism; Then again, you may not.

What struck me about that conversation, the very first time I heard it, was how it illustrates perfectly the compromises and double-think we’re all guilty of in our everyday lives.  How many times have we cried out enraged against cruelty to animals while simultaneously filling our bellies with their flesh?  How many times have we fed the ground remains of some animals to the animal companions within our own homes?  The pressure for this kind of double-think is so rampant throughout our society, that most of us are completely unaware that we do it.  We’re immersed in it; it’s become part of the way we think, or rather the way we double-think ourselves, in order to rationalize our actions and be “normal” members of society.

But what is so “normal” about our society?  When our society is fractured and split by the great language divide, when our compassion is split between the animals that need to be cared about and the ones that can be abused, is being “normal” a worthy goal?

What is “normal” anyway?  I’m going to be cliche here and quote from Merriam-Webster Dictionary…

• Main Entry: ¹nor·mal

1 : perpendicular; especially : perpendicular to a tangent at a point of tangency
2 a : according with, constituting, or not deviating from a norm, rule, or principle b : conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern
3 : occurring naturally <normal immunity>
4 a : of, relating to, or characterized by average intelligence or development b : free from mental disorder : sane**

Here, I believe, lies the fundamental difference between the idealist and the “normal” people.  “Normal” to most people equals conformity and sanity, while the idealist sees conformity as insanity. How is it sane to settle for the way things are when the world could be so much better- if everyone just lived the values they already profess to cherish?  Normal people see seemingly unattainable goals (that go against the mainstream of society) as impractical.  Idealists see the seeds of change in thoughtful choices and small everyday acts of kindness.  Even Cyrano himself (in the play Cyrano de Bergerac) claims:

What say you? It is useless? Ay, I know
But who fights ever hoping for success?
I fought for lost cause, and for fruitless quest!

What does it matter if the numbers are few? If society frowns upon the person who devotes time to causes that seem fringe, hopeless and impractical?  Some things are worth fighting for.  Some things are worth speaking out for.  I may have begun studying Esperanto purely as a hobby, but I still respect it’s ideals and culture and would never disparage it.  I became vegan for other reasons: for the animals; for my conscience; and for a better, more peaceful world.  And unlike Cyrano, I don’t NEED to fight.  All I need to do is be true to myself and my ideals.  Whether or not something is attainable in my lifetime (or even at all) is irrelevant. Some things are worth doing simply because they are the right thing TO do.

And maybe, just maybe, our small numbers will make the difference.

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever does.” –Margaret Mead

I think The Doctor would approve.

**In the above Merriam-Webster definition, I made the text that I wanted to draw attention to both bold and italicized.

LINKS:

To learn more about Esperanto:
http://www.lernu.net

To learn more about Veganism:
http://www.veganoutreach.org
http://www.compassionatecooks.com

Downloadable Podcasts:
Food for thought

Have you ever noticed how language affects people’s perceptions?  How it reflects how people and society in general think as well as influences the thoughts themselves?  I’m sure that you have, and I’ve given this a fair bit of thought lately.  As a vegan, I sometimes have to watch the way I phrase my words so that other people are not offended.  It’s not that the content of my speech is untrue or the concepts they represent are foreign to the people I’m speaking to.  It’s simply a matter of bluntness and a reflection of the difference between how most (AR) vegans and omnivores view the world.

When I look at someone eating a chicken sandwhich, I don’t think “chicken/food” sandwhich.  I think a sandwhich made from birds/chickens.  So while an omnivore might say they eat “chicken”, I would say “chickens.”  You’d be surprised how that one extra letter changes people’s perception.  I remember once, my family went to Denny’s.  I gave the waitress a “Go Veg” card and she asked me if I ate meat.  “No,” I answered.  “I don’t eat flesh or secretions.”  “Wow! That makes it sound really unappetizing!” was her response.  Well, yeah. And the funny thing was, it didn’t occur to me that I was saying anything odd.  That’s honestly how I view meat and dairy. I mean, that is what it IS. But when you phrase things to reflect the being that existed BEFORE he/she became someone’s food, it chips away at the little wall that people build up around the whole subject of animals and food.

My little 8 year old son made a similar observation not long ago.  We went to a festival and overheard a woman talking about her rabbits.  She kept talking about how “it” acted, what “it” liked and didn’t like, how some were good for food and others for pets.  My little boy turned to me and said, “I don’t like when people call animals ‘it’!”  It’s another manifestation of cognitive dissonance. If someONE becomes a someTHING, it’s okay to do whatever you want to them; right?  ‘It’ can be used for humans too, especially when the gender is unknown, but generally people refer to animals as ‘it’ even WHEN they know the sex.

I was almost thirty before I decided that eating meat (and later dairy) was not a moral thing to do, especially when we can live just fine (and in most cases BETTER) without animal products.  It took slow chips over my lifetime, and eventually a couple big dents, to destroy my cognitive dissonance so that I saw the animal on my plate.  Our whole society tells us it’s okay, so it’s only natural that people shield themselves from the unpleasant truth about meat and dairy.  Chickens become “chicken.”  Cows become “meat”, “beef”, or “steak”.  Cow’s milk simply become’s “milk” and baby cows become “veal.”  If we are truly okay with the way we treat animals as food, then we shouldn’t be afraid to call them by their proper names.  It’s not extreme, or at least it shouldn’t be.  It’s simply honest.  And if we can’t be honest about our own actions, perhaps we should rethink them.

About a year ago, on our way to Farm Sanctuary, someone told me that something I said was “Extreme.”  So I wrote a poem about how I felt.  I think it ties in to this subject perfectly, so I’ll end by reprinting it.  I hope you like it.

Extreme

Extreme… what does that word mean anyway?
You use the words that others don’t use
Live what you think, and mean what you say
Call things what they are and not hide your views

Dairy and cheese are secretions from cows.
Meat is flesh. Call it by its proper name.
“Beef” once was living, Pork- hogs, piglets, sows.
Nice euphemisms are used to kill blame.

Walk past the mass grave marked “Meat Department”
Put “Go veg” cards on the Live Lobster tank
Feel their cold prison with your fingers bent
doomed to die so butchers go to the bank

In a world where innocents have no voice,
being extreme is the only sane choice.

Science Fiction, the misunderstood bastion of the nerd, is more than space battles and futuristic technology.  It’s the ideal medium for social commentary in a world that doesn’t welcome astute observation.  Where else could the evils of our everyday lives be addressed in a socially acceptable manner?  Modern Westerners might be bored to tears studying Greek morality plays, but many will happily while away the hours debating the morality of Star Trek‘s transporter or speciesm in Planet of the Apes.

The authors, the best ones imo, act as gadflies of our time, but long after their initial warnings their voices are still heard.  And many of them are warnings, whether it’s to watch out for the dangers of too much government, the erosion of personal liberties, or simply our own prejudices and weaknesses.  There’s nothing so disturbing as to see our foibles through the eyes of another.

Physicist‘s and Philosopher‘s alike have written non-fiction books about Star Trek.  Star Wars mythology deals with the Buddhist philosophy of non attachment.  Joss Whedon’s Dollhouse tells the story of modern day slavery with a technological twist.  The Puppet Masters (by Heinlein) addresses the Red Scare; Alien Nation – racial prejudice.

Our language has been enriched by the genre as well.  Heinlein’s Stranger in a Strange Land introduced the term “grok.”  “Doublethink,” “Big Brother ,” and even “cyberspace” owe their existance in the English language to genre literature.

The ability to transcend time, whether a novel or other media, is the hallmark of a truly great scifi storyline.  Certainly, the same claim could be made for any classic, but the genre lends itself especially well to this criteria.  Many of today’s classic novels were written as science fiction, from George Orwell’s 1984 to (a soon to be classic imo) Corey Doctorow’s Little Brother.

So why does popular media seek to stupefy us with a continual barrage of inane nonsense?  Why do network producers air great shows like Firefly only to sabotage them?  Why tell creators that they shouldn’t spend too much time on character development?  Why insist on more violence and less plot?  Hasn’t it already been shown that the lasting appeal lies just as much in the plot and characters as well as the technology and special effects? Where is their respect for the aesthetic and intellectual taste of the masses?

Indeed, there is plenty of bad scifi to go around.  But just as you shouldn’t judge the merit of English lit by a dime romance novel, neither should the merits of Scifi be judged by cheap special effects and sexy green skinned women.  Producers, publishers, and network execs should, if nothing else, respect the interests of a segment of the population that spends an incredible amount of money on anything related to SciFi – namely NERDS.

Nerds typically come across as socially awkward though rather intelligent people, or, in the words of Merriam-Webster: an unstylish, unattractive, or socially inept person ; especially : one slavishly devoted to intellectual or academic pursuit.  The social awkwardness may be true in many cases, but intelligence is nothing to be ashamed of.  The pursuits of technological prowess or academic excellence are worthwhile ways to spend time.  Despite network producers and movie makers that seek to dumb down our entertainment choices, scifi continues to bring in some of the biggest money too.  Just ask George Lucas or Joss Whedon.

Let’s face it.  People want a story that entertains AND makes them think.

There’s one more point I’d like to make.  Scifi is relevant to ANYONE who’s interested in stimulating their mind as well as their satisfying their thirst for action and adventure.  And if you are a nerd, so much the better. Nerds, despite the pencil-protector-glasses-wearing image, are in.  So grab a Heinlein novel and wear your pointy ears with pride.  Nerds rule the world.

According to Merriam-Webster, etiquette is “the conduct or procedure required by good breeding or prescribed by authority to be observed in social or official life.” Netiquette, the online extension of that philosophy, is “etiquette governing communication on the Internet.”

Or…

To sum it up even more simply – Politeness.

It seems lately that a lot of times we forget the simple courtesies. Of course there are reasons for that. We are in a hurry so we sometimes say things off the cuff, without thinking. Online, things become a little more complicated, since we are denied the benefit of tone of voice and body language. People try to offset this deficiency by using emoticons to suggest in which tone the message should be taken, whether it’s an email, webpage, or posting on a forum. There are also ways to type out your message (without the emoticon) to suggest emotion, such as typing in all capital letters. Typing an All Caps message is the Net-speak equivalent of shouting at the top of your lungs.

Certainly newbies to the information superhighway are going to make mistakes. It’s expected that people joining a membership Internet community (such as certain membership websites with forums) read the rules and the FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions). It’s common courtesy to become acquainted with the “rules of the house” in order to avoid common mistakes. However, even long standing members might accidentally step on someone’s toes, in which case a warning will be issued. Sometimes its just pointing something out, sometimes it’s more “official” such as a moderator banning someone from a particular thread for being troublesome.

This is all pretty obvious to most people who have spent any amount of time on the web, so I won’t waste any more of your time discussing it.

However…

There is one breach of Netiquette in particular that really bothers me. It’s becoming more than a simple pet peeve of mine, because it points to a particularly annoying attitude. It’s assumptions.

Let me explain. Everyone makes assumptions. I know that. The fact that you don’t realize you are making an assumption isn’t the point. We make assumptions in our everyday lives. However, imo, when it comes to courtesy, you should always assume that the person who posted “X” remark did so because they made a mistake or were unaware of a certain policy. Ignorance of the rules is no excuse, but, as Hamlet so eloquently says, “Use every man after his desert, and who shall scape whipping? Use them after your own honor and dignity.” In other words, give them the benefit of the doubt. If someone makes a mistake, point it out and give them the chance to make it right or apologize.

I’ll give a couple examples illustrating this. Since I’m by no means perfect, they are personal examples – both as a newbie to one forum and a long standing member of another (I’ll exclude names because that would be rude).

I joined a free membership forum and posted frequently as a new member. Generally, this isn’t a good idea, because you usually want to get a feel for the way people treat each other and phrase things before you do this, but I did. I made a mistake. I felt very comfortable because it reminded me a great deal of another forum I knew very well. If I have some experience that someone is asking for help with, I try to answer their question. So, when someone posted a question on the forum asking for help weaning themselves from a certain addiction, I answered the question. I told them to think of product X a certain way so that they would be so disgusted by it they wouldn’t want to consume it (this method has worked well for me). I was afraid that my post would sound obnoxious, so I suggested some alternate websites that might help and prefaced the rest of my post with “Not trying to sound obnoxious, but…” Not the best choice of words, but I couldn’t think how to phrase my post properly.

Nineteen posts later, after we’ve discussed several other things, someone posts a very harsh critique of my response. The original poster (whose question I was addressing) took no offense. Neither did anyone else on the thread. One person did. Fine. They could have emailed me a response saying they thought my answer was inappropriate. I could have apologized or rephrased my response on the relevant thread, but they chose to verbally attack me in the thread itself. It’s not really polite to derail a thread from its topic that way, so I answered the post with an apology to the original poster (who was not offended) and any further exchange with the other person was through private messages.

I made several mistakes there. One, I felt too comfortable there because the forum was so similar to another one I had frequented. I obviously should have phrased my post differently. The other posters did not take offense, but I should have taken more time to word the post. I hesitate to say that I should not have posted my response at all, since the person did find it helpful. An emoticon might have helped, and while I normally go smiley-crazy, a smiley didn’t seem appropriate to the subject matter so I left it out. That was probably a mistake too.

However, the majority of the problem could have been avoided by simply sending me a private message (pm through the forums or email) calling my attention to any possible misunderstanding. Instead of ASSUMING that I was simply being a jerk, they could have reread my post and ASSUMED I made a mistake. By privately messaging me, I could have rephrased my response without derailing the topic of the thread. There would have been no (or little) unpleasantness.

This hearkens back to the whole issue of tone. Emoticons help. Carefully phrasing your words helps. But sometimes people will just misunderstand you. If someone calls you on something you’ve done, you can also make the ASSUMPTION that they are genuinely trying to help. If they are addressing your actions and refrain from personal attacks, most differences can be resolved.

As I remember back to past emails, posts, and chats, I would say 99.9% of misunderstandings are about tone. Do yourself and the other person a favor. Assume that people mean well, and be polite when pointing out errors of judgment. Please, do it privately.

Another instance was as a long standing member on another forum. I’d read the rules, felt comfortable, and knew many on line friends there. I phrased most of my responses pretty carefully and went out of my way to be polite. I tried to stay away from explosive threads that dealt in politics or religion, but I would occasionally pop in if I felt I could learn or contribute something.

This particular breach on my part, I’m still unsure of. As a member of this community for a long time, I knew that some threads could get pretty heated, but also lots of times people would joke around. I’d witnessed people attacking others (myself included) on some occasions, but then the mods would step in. Overall, it was a nice community, and I felt confident I wouldn’t step on anyone’s toes. I had even been offended by the person in charge of the community, and as a result I went somewhere else for a bit til I thought about it some more. I decided that maybe I was overreacting, so I went back. No harsh words on my part.

After a few more months, I was on a particular thread and it was getting pretty heated. It really didn’t seem like there was any reason for it, so to lighten the tension I posted a joke (*gany whistles nonchalantly*). A couple people thanked me for the post (they had a “thank you” button), and the thread continued. I posted a second joke, and immediately found an official warning in my Control Panel informing me that I was banned from the thread for “Peanut gallery idiocy.” Was that REALLY necessary? Couldn’t they, after my first joke, have simply emailed me without the ban and said, “Please don’t do that?” Of course, it’s their forum, so it’s their rules. That’s totally within their rights. What was particularly upsetting was that I didn’t see it coming. It felt like a slap in the face.

What happened, when I look back, was that I stepped on the moderator’s toes. They were warning the poster, and my joke they took as an attempt to do their job for them. Fine. I can understand them taking it that way, though it’s not what I intended at all. It was obviously a misunderstanding. But given the fact that I’d been a long standing member for years and all my other posts had been polite (I had NEVER been warned for any breach of behavior), it seems like they could have used a bit more tact. They could have given me the benefit of the doubt. Given the fact that I had been offended (by the founder) before on this forum, I felt foolish and wrote a polite letter back. I said that I thanked them for all their past support but for that and other reasons I would like to unsubscribe from their forums. That’s it. No harsh words (I can’t remember if I told them I was bothered by the ban). I expected them to simply unsubscribe me. When I checked back, I found a message saying that I was “banned- no reason specified” and it would be lifted NEVER.

I’m not going to lie about it. That bothered me. What bothered me mostly was the implied rudeness. And I’m fully ready to admit that perhaps I got it wrong. Maybe when you unsubscribe from the forums, they don’t have an unsubscribe feature so it automatically becomes a ban. I don’t know. I have no intention of going back, so it really doesn’t matter. But given the pattern of behavior prior to the Forum Ban, I can’t help feeling slighted.

So, while I realize that my post here regarding my own experiences is going to come across a bit harsh, there is one overwhelming point to this entire post. Give people the benefit of the doubt and use a little politeness when dealing with others. It should be common courtesy.

During the holiday weekend, I was lucky enough to attend Farm Sanctuary’s annual Fourth of July Pig-Nic (Watkins Glen, NY). The sanctuary cares for victims of the animal agriculture industry. When we stopped at a convenience store along the way, I was struck by the smell of hot dogs, cheese, and other assorted animal products – the very reason the sanctuary exists in the first place. So I wrote a poem about it.

*Just a friendly warning: I use different words to describe these everyday things, so some may consider the poem graphic. In my opinion, its no more graphic than watching someone eat a chicken sandwich.

***

The Road to Farm Sanctuary

*

Road through the Poconos. Convenience store

sells meat from dead cows. The stench fills the room,

chips and soda next to secretions and gore

stolen from mothers, a belly their tomb.

*

On the road driving to an oasis,

kindness in our flesh based society,

compassion for all their only basis.

Rights for the weak not only the mighty.

*

A farm picnic free of slaughterhouse death.

Rub a pigs belly, and call him by name.

Cows nuzzle their calves and feel their warm breath,

Care for their babies. In that we’re the same.

*

Contrast our world to this one peaceful Farm

Be kind. Go vegan. Do others no harm.

*****************************

I wrote the next poem in response to someone who told me they thought “The Road to Farm Sanctuary” was extreme. (Same warning applies)

***

Extreme

*

Extreme… what does that word mean anyway?

You use the words that others don’t use,

Live what you think, and mean what you say,

Call things what they are and not hide your views.

*

Dairy and cheese are secretions from cows.

Meat is flesh. Call it by its proper name.

“Beef” once was living, Pork- hogs, piglets, sows.

Nice euphemisms are used to kill blame.

*

Walk past the mass grave marked “Meat Department.”

Put “Go veg” cards on the Live Lobster tank,

Feel their cold prison with your fingers bent,

doomed to die so butchers go to the bank.

*

In a world where innocents have no voice,

being extreme is the only sane choice.

************************************

- Thank you to my wonderful hubby for taking me to Farm Sanctuary for my birthday. Also, thanks to my friend, Angela, for encouraging me to post my work.

Usually that term “Left of Center” refers to deviating from the correct path, whether in traffic or philosophically in life. I have swerved slightly left of center to avoid driving too close to a bicyclist on the right side of the road. No traffic was coming from the opposite direction, no cars to hit head on. The bicyclist was safe; I was safe; and all was well.

Are there other instances when its okay to swerve left of center? When regard for another might cause you to slightly alter your ethical course?

When is it okay to break the rules?

Henry David Thoreau said that, to slightly modify his work “Civil Disobedience”, that we are obligated to break the rules when obeying them means committing an immoral act. One example is that if a runaway slave comes to you for shelter, you are morally required to help them whether or not that assistance breaks the law.

But could you extend this further? What if you break into the slaveholder’s plantation and free the slaves yourself? Thoreau’s rule wouldn’t necessarily apply because you are not legally required to do something first. You are taking the initiative by breaking into a slaveholder’s home and “business.” I guess you could say that once you were at the home, you felt it morally imperative to free the slaves, and the law would legally prohibit that. It’s food for thought. I really need to reread “Civil Disobedience.”

That’s the trouble with law and ethics. They tend to sway and define each other. The law is supposed to be a reflection of a society’s ethics, but at the same time how do you define a Universal ethical standard that everyone agrees on? A few hundred years ago, slave holders in the States thought their position was morally justifiable. Very few villains think of themselves as such; Rather they are the heroes in their own lives, and, in their opinion, society is skewed.

I think Thoreau had the right idea that you have a duty to break the law when obedience requires an immoral act. But perhaps we should be selective about the things we choose to act on, curbing our aggressive tendencies into gentler actions, lest we commit immoral acts ourselves. Does the world really need another holy war?

Finally, let our left of center leanings create newer avenues of thought. Not forcing others to follow our path, but rather encouraging others to follow (as I did with the bicyclist) the path that harms no one. Breaking the law should not be a light matter. But neither should the safety and welfare of others, which always comes first.

I was shocked when my seven year old asked me not to use the word “boo boo” anymore when he got hurt. It’s an “injury.” Then, when he saw the look on my face, he said “boo boo” was fine as long as it wasn’t in front of other people.

I’m happy his vocabulary’s improving, but yet I can’t help missing all the mistakes he made when he was younger. Wrong tenses. E an D tagged on to make past tense words like “eat-ed” instead of “ate.”

His language skills have improved as he’s become more literate. He doesn’t always want me to read to him, because he can read for himself. “Boo boos” seemed to be a holdover from an earlier time when I could make everything better with just a kiss.

Maybe its just the thought that one more stage of his childhood is ending. I love the little boy he’s become just as much as the baby and toddler he used to be. I can play games with him now that I never could when he was younger. Heck, he’s even tied me at chess (not that I’m a Master, but still)! We play ball, have tickle fights, and cook together. We bake cakes, and I mix. He stirs. Then he licks clean the spoon and the bowl.

But I still want to make his boo boos better with a kiss. I miss the mistakes he’s outgrown, though its fun to watch him ask “Liquid refreshment, please?” instead of just asking for water.

His growing vocabulary, while impressive, still occasionally misuses the words he’s learning. It doesn’t happen often. Actually it happens less and less as he grows up, but it does always make me smile.

Here’s an example. The other night we were watching a movie where the hero referred to the heroine as “belonging to him.” My son was indignant! He rounded on me, exclaiming, “Hey! She’s not an OBSTACLE to be owned by someone! She’s a person!”

So…I think I may still have a little time left. Those boo boos aren’t going to go away without my help just yet.

Cemeteries are some of the most beautiful places in the world. Hospitals are not. So why is it we go to Hospitals to get better and cemeteries when we die? In my not so humble opinion, it should be the other way around.Fresh air, sunshine, trees and flowers freshly ordered by Mother Nature, are all lovely inducements for recovery. How many times have we heard on sitcoms the actor (who is not a doctor but plays one on t.v.) tell a patient they need to go outside and get some fresh air? What higher authority do we need? Isn’t the outdoors itself enough to lure us?

There are other enticements as well. Cemeteries appeal to our love of the outdoors, like parks, with the additional advantages of statues, mausoleums, and other wonderful examples of art and architecture. They combine parks, history, and art. Tombstones tell stories to anyone willing to listen. And there’s never a fee.

However, Hospitals almost ALWAYS charge a fee and aren’t nearly as alluring. Experiences there are almost always painful, in practice as well as when you get the bill. It’s never relaxing being poked and prodded by doctors and nurses while you’re imprisoned inside starkly sterile white walls. And yet their chief incentive is to treat you to keep you out of the cemetery. No, give me cemeteries every time. They’re much more cheerful.