Poem: a small orb
a small orb
-of captured moonshine,
-of Diana’s loveliness caught within crystal waters
-or
filled with a wisp of cloud
whose delicate lining fell to earth,
its flakes gathered and carefully stored beneath
the smooth unbroken surface
like a dream
or
thoughts of love
*
a vial
of polished simplicity
containing shining chaos
*
my thumb traces
its black capped tip
i feel
its coolness in my palm
i hear
the lovely chime of silver upon glass
as my ring
- skates
across its surface
- A kind gesture made solid
and held within
- my ink stained fingers.
*I wrote this last week during the Writers’ Workshop and drew upon lessons from my poetry class. This was my first attempt at using enjambment to create tension. Unfortunately, WordPress didn’t like it, so I was forced to put dashes into the poem when I wanted to leave spaces at the beginning of a line (except for the 1st 2 lines which was intentional).
I don’t usually use a lot of similes in my poems, but these phrases kept echoing in my head so I went ahead and put them in. It’s a little more flowery than I usually write, but I like it.
My husband and son went to gem mining while I was in class, and they brought back a little bottle of silver flakes for me. I used this ‘Abiding Image’ as the inspiration for my poem. Feedback is encouraged and welcome. Thank you for your time!
July 20th, 2010 at 9:46 am
Don’t worry about WordPress forcing you to do something you didn’t want. After all, ee cummings was quite the master of enjambment, and he combined it with the use of punctuation as an art form!
And despite your feeling that it is more flowery than your usual writing, this poem shows that you’ve learned your poetry class lessons very well.
July 22nd, 2010 at 10:07 pm
I don’t ever feel qualified to comment on poetry other than to say I like it (if I do). I do like this. I felt it worked very well, with or without the photo.
And I learned something. Never heard of enjambment before. I had to go look it up. Thanks for the enlightenment.
~jon